One of the many things that fantasy has going for it is it’s just plain more interesting than the real world.
We don’t even have time for me to list all the ways, but trust me, there’s a lot of them. Still, reality might be just that much more bearable if we were able to take some fantasy elements and just … you know, scoot them over into the real world all sneaky-like when no one’s looking. Wouldn’t that be cool? Potentially fatal? Sure. But you know what? Those are the risks you take sometimes.
Today’s Top Ten Tuesday is supposed to be the last ten books I abandoned, but one, I want to focus on some positive things instead, and two, I’d like to keep with the fantasy theme of this month in light of Wyrd & Wonder.
So here we are. Doing my rebel thing that I do. I’ve talked about fantasy creatures I’d love to own and also fantasy worlds I’d love to visit, but I figured, hey, why not combine the two? But also, I’m kinda lazy, so let’s just bring these things to me in the real world instead, where I have a (slightly) better chance at surviving them.
Useless Superpowers
The Ben Braver Series
Okay … hear me out. Everyone wants superpowers, right? But obviously, not everyone can handle superpowers. So let’s make it a toss-up. Sure, you might get something super awesome like the ability to fly or super strength … buuut you also might end up transformed into a goat for the rest of your life. You just never know.
“Ooooo! Mac and cheese!” Penny said.
“Hugs and kisses!” Noah chimed in.
“Chips and salsa!” Penny exclaimed. “I like this game!”
“Blood and honey!!”
We all looked at the goat.
“No?” Totes said, bobbing his head, embarrassed. “Okay then … not blood and honey.”
Cultures Revolving Around Dragons
(… or any mythical creature)
Black Leviathan
Honestly, I’d be remiss if I didn’t have something dragon related on this list. But settling for mere dragons existing isn’t good enough. I read a lot of dragon books, but this is one of my favorite concepts from them so far. None of this “hey, let’s all ride dragons.” No, that’s an honor earned by the very few, which kills more people than who succeed, okay? Because you are squishy and flammable. In Black Leviathan, cities revolve around dragons. They have them as pets and helpers. There’s a whole culture around hunting the various species and using every single scrap of the bodies to create goods, almost in a reverent manner.
Hidden Doors
The Wayward Children Series
Just because I’m a lazy lump who’d rather bring fantasy to me than have to go out and seek it doesn’t mean everyone has to be that way. Doors should be a thing! If reality leaves you disillusioned and disaffected, you go right ahead through that door to your perfect place and don’t look back. Also, I feel like parents would try just that much harder if they knew there was a good chance their kids would just choose to vanish elsewhere rather than put up with them any longer. That part may just be wishful thinking, though.
The Thunderhead
Arc of a Scythe series
Who doesn’t want to have an AI that will bend to their every demand and whim … almost? It’s like Google on a boatload of steroids … plus Super Saiyan Blue, digivolved, max evolution, level 100. I know that people in the series are bored with it and don’t care, but can you imagine having all that knowledge at your fingertips?! I would learn so much random, useless information that my husband would probably end up committing homicide just to get me to shut up about it. Totally worth it.
Reading Characters From Books
The Unlikely Escape of Uriah Heep
Admittedly, this one could get out of hand really easily, so there’d maybe have to be some sort of limitation on it. But how much fun would this be?! Things get even more entertaining when you realize that two people can read out the same character and have two different people emerge, because a character’s personality and traits when they emerge are influenced by the reader’s perception of them. How freaking neat is that?! Fair warning: there are going to be a lot of sexy, murderous, slightly conceited, probably sociopathic characters wandering around if ever I’m given this power. I’d apologize, but I’ll be far too busy plotting how to take over the world. *shrug*
“Absolute evil,” Charley said.
“Glorious. We should all strive to be the absolute version of something.”
Darkin
The Nevernight Chronicles
I realize this might be a little … problematic (and this is where we pretend 100% of my list isn’t problematic, thanks). Especially considering what the darkin are (which we won’t get into because of spoilers). How awesome would it be to have a shadow pet that feeds off your fear, though? One may argue that fear is a good thing, but hey, darkin would make fantastic first responders, where having an additional set of eyes would come in handy, too.
Mia smacked her backside. ‘I’d settle for lips to kiss my sweet behind.’
‘…I would have to find it first…’
‘Arses are like fine wine, Mister Kindly. Better too little than too much.’
‘ …a beauty and a philosopher. be still my beating heart…’ The not-cat looked down at its translucent chest ‘…O, wait…”
Shadepacting
Steel Crow Saga
So imagine that you find your perfect animal and you accept part of their soul into yours. It changes them into a bigger, badder form and turns them into a shade-type creature that you can summon at will and share emotions. That’s shadepacting. That’s it. Sounds pretty freaking neat, doesn’t it? Better, even, than Pokemon (although, you only get one of them, so choose carefully). In the book, it seems to be used in conjunction with the military, but it doesn’t have to be. Think of all the really convenient domestic uses this could have, too!
Bolstered by her early success, Lee prodded him. Come on, now, she said. Out with it.
The rooster took her encouragement well, because Lee felt the connection between them open wider. I want to bathe in the blood of my enemies beneath the cold and unfeeling moon.
Lee stopped dead. Uh, what?
For too long, the other creatures of the world have not trembled when my shadow falls upon them, the rooster went on. With your pact, I will at last see them cower—
Gonna stop you right there, Lee said. I’m starting to think maybe you and I want different things, little bird.
…Oh, the rooster said to her after a moment. A shame.
Talking Swords
Warbreaker
If you didn’t see this one coming, do you even know me? Pfft. Talking swords are the best swords (except Excalibur). They’re all sharp and witty and snarky and more than a little stabby. I have yet to meet a talking sword that I haven’t liked. Think Bleach, with their zanpakutos that take on their master’s personalities. You can find talking swords whose personality is a good match for yours. I mean, the real world has a marked lack of quests, which is disappointing, but with a talking sword, heck, you can make your own quests if you’re so inclined. Obviously, it would take a super talented craftsman to make one of these, and it’d be a carefully guarded secret. But I’m covered, because I know my husband would 100% quit his job and dedicate his life to this, so I’d get my sword in the end, either way.
Time Machines
The Chronicles of St. Mary’s
FOR RESEARCH. I want to clarify that. Can’t have Joe Schmo go messing up the timeline because he’s stupid and hasn’t had a single good, original thought a day in his life, can we? I support time machines in the way they’re used in this series, which, as I said, is for historical research with the idea of observing and in no way interfering. Think about it! No more arguing and debating over what happened at the biggest events in history, how they went down, what dinosaurs really looked like. It’d all have to be highly guarded with a very select group able to use them, but I, for one, would love the chance to solve some of the world’s biggest mysteries with some first-hand documentation.
Books of Household Magic
What We Found in the Corn Maze and How It Saved a Dragon
The bane of kids everywhere, and the delight of adults. On the one hand: magic exists. Huzzah! On the other: it can only be used for chores. It’s almost a necessary compromise, to keep people from abusing it. Besides, it’s still handy. Think of all the time you can spend hunting dragons or adventuring with your talking sword if you used spells like To Untangle Yarn or To Change the Color of a Room. No more menial tasks! It’s the perfect way to round off the list, because who has time to fit all the newfound fantasy elements that have been sneakily shoved into reality? Not many people. This one would be a game-changer, though.
“What?”
“Irksome had kids. Otherwise why go on about how good it is to do chores? The really cool magic Irksome probably kept for herself.”
You’ve basically sold me on all the books on your list (even the ones that I’ve ALREADY read coz now I want to re-read Nevernight! Oh Mister Kindly 😍)!! But really, all of these books sound amazing and I mean who cares about an 82% chance of fatalities!? I’m totally here for all the sexy, murderous, slightly conceited, probably sociopathic characters!! 🤣 I absolutely love this post. If only all of it could happen! Imagine how horrifyingly awesome it’d be if ALL OF THIS happened at the same time. Yowza. What a time! Haha
I support the re-reading of Nevernight. xD Always. Hey, 82% chance of fatalities is really an 18% chance to survive, and that’s not bad, given most of these things.
Hmmm … maybe not all at the same time? I think we should roll these things out slowly. Maybe more people will survive that way LOL.
What a fun list! 🙂
My TTT .
Lydia recently posted…Wednesday Weekly Blogging Challenge: Favourite Holiday of the Year and Why
AHHHHH! I love this post and I love your choices. I was gonna completely steal this idea and then do it but you basically stole all the ideas I would have chosen. Of course, that makes sense since you live in my head and all… so yeah this is brilliant. The only thing I would like is a real life love potion that only I can use and only on “the boy.”
Thank youuu haha. Oops? You could still totally do this post, though. There are plenty of other great fantasy elements that should be a thing. 😛
Unfortunately, even in fantasy, love potions are totally taboo. =/
I love a hidden doorway. My favourite hotel as a child had a wood panel at the top of the grand staircase and. If you knew where to look you could find the hidden doorway which led to more rooms. I always used to stay in one of those rooms.
And the goat bit was hilarious!
Here’s mine http://bookwormsanonymous.blog/2020/05/12/top-ten-tuesday-the-last-ten-books-i-abandoned/
Oh my gosh, that sounds absolutely brilliant! We have a little hidden nook in my daughter’s playroom, where you open the door and crawl through a little attic-ish tunnel and it leads to a teensy room on the other side. Why? I have no idea, but I love it. xD
Personally, I would love a little magic to help with household chores. If I could wave my wand and have the kitchen clean itself, I would be in HEAVEN. It would save so much time and make me so very happy 🙂
Happy TTT!
Susan
http://www.blogginboutbooks.com
Oh my gosh, right? Kitchen cleaning is the bane of my existence, because it’s never done. It’s somehow the messiest room in my house, even though I clean it all the freaking time!
Great post this week! I’m going to have to read The Chronicles of St. Mary. 🙂
The lack of a coherent, tight plot really bugs me about that series, but I recommend it just for the action and laughs. I can’t help it. Even though I ended up rating a lot of the books lower, I keep going back because they make me laugh like crazy and have some of the best quotes and banter.
Yes, I would love ot be able to shadepact! Either that, or take it a step further and just make Pokemon real lol.
Ren Strange recently posted…Stay at Home Book Tag
I dunno, I’d feel bad for Pokemon if they were made real, because I don’t think humanity can handle that level of responsibility. People sometimes can’t take care of their pets, let alone having 150 Pokemon. xD But one shadepact seems doable.
I tried not to be too negative with mine — I ended up writing about all the books I’ve stalled on due to being a mood reader, most of which I plan to go back to!
Fun take. 😀
Nikki @ The Bibliophibian recently posted…Top Ten Tuesday
That’s an interesting take! And I totally hear you on that. Being a mood reader is so confusing. I can love a book and still not want to read it, given a certain mood lol.
I always enjoy reading your take on common memes and tags. Your twists are so much fun, and your writing tone is so humorous and entertaining.
And your site makes me so nostalgic for the days when Pokemon ruled my world for some reason…
Love tuning in for your posts! Just thought I would gush over you for a sec… you’re like my first book blog crush.
Bri recently posted…Behind the Blogger Book Tag
Awww thank you so much. You’re gonna make me cry. T_T Thank you so much. <3 This totally made my week.
Oh. Oh, yes. *Those* nostalgic days. You know, way back when. *coughs and hides Switch with Pokemon Sword*
Nice list! Some of those are more sci-fi I guess.
Here’s my TTT
AB @ iwishiownedabookstore recently posted…TTT: The Last Books I Abandoned
That’s true. Sci-fi/fantasy is a bit of a crossover thing, so I tend to just lump them together unless they’re very clearly sci-fi. Especially when it’s convenient, and I totally want those things regardlesss. xD
Cool list! I love the idea of time machines and hidden doors. I would get the heck away from COVID 19 as fast as I could!
Tammy @ Books, Bones & Buffy recently posted…Twelve Upcoming YA Fantasy Books to Get Excited About #wyrdandwonder
That would definitely be an added benefit, wouldn’t it?
I want my own Mr. Kindly <3 Great list!
Brittany recently posted…Wyrd & Wonder Review: Time Cat
Me, too! Who wouldn’t want a snarky not-cat companion?
I would SO take a hidden door right now! Fun post!
Dedra @ A Book Wanderer recently posted…Top Ten Tuesday: The Last Ten Books I Abandoned
Yes! The darker the world, the better, please.
Great list! I totally agree about the hidden doors. I’d like to add deamons (from His Dark Materials) to the list! 😊
And you totally sold me on The Unlikely Escape of Uriah Heep, I immediately added the book to my TBR-list!
Oooh, that’s a really good one! Hadn’t even thought about that, but for sure. How neat would that be?!
I hope you enjoy it! I liked it so much that I immediately had to put the author’s second book on my TBR (and it comes out soon, and I can’t wait to read it!)
Look I would totally worship dragons…
Annemieke recently posted…Dancing out of #WyrdandWonder 2020 | It Is Big~
Worship dragons, ride dragons, raise dragons, become a dragon … you know, all the dragony things. 😉
[…] posts. I like to highlight a couple of them. On The Bookwyrm’s Den I found this fun list with Fantasy World Elements We Need in the Real World. I can’t agree more! Jessticulates wrote an interesting post about the lack of centaurs in […]