Okay, who hasn’t read a book and thought, wow, this world is super cool, and I should be part of it, even though I’ll probably die in 0.13 seconds?

I’d be super suspicious of that person. I mean, maybe not the dying thing. Maybe that’s just the books I read. But surely there’s at least one book you’ve wanted to jump into.

This week’s Top Ten Tuesday is characters we’d like to swap places with.

✦ The Reckoners Series ✦

Listen. I don’t know who I want to swap with here. All I know is I want to be in this world.

And not just because Prof exists in this world. But maybe a little because Prof exists in this world.

Ways I could totally be killed:

✦ Playing with fun techy gadgets, even though Prof told me not to a hundred times.
✦ Steelheart!
✦ Oh, look, I’m an Epic!
✦ What? Where’s an Epic?
✦ Testing the limits of Prof’s forcefield
✦ Oops, I asked Megan one too many questions
✦ Oooh, what does this shiny gadget do?!

✦ Lundy || In An Absent Dream ✦

Lundy’s door opens to the Goblin Market, and I can’t think of anywhere more perfect than a world with a barter economy that’s based on fair value.

I mean, I’m really good at following rules. Also, very good at bending them and finding loopholes. See? I was born to visit this place.

What’s even better is that when you’re tired of being a human, you just have to rack up debts and, bam, you’re a bird! Tired of that? Work off your debts and become a human again. It’s a much more tedious form of shapeshifting, but hey, you’ve gotta work with what you’ve got.

✦ Amani || Rebel of the Sands ✦

I, too, find myself romantically inclined to stubborn, handsome foreigners who keep getting in my way. Yet, oddly enough, Jin is not the reason I would swap places with Amani. Blasphemy, right?!

In case you’re wondering my qualifications, I’m a moderately accurate shot with a rifle, and with a handgun … well … I know which end to not point at myself. So I can obviously handle being the Blue-Eyed Bandit.

Erm … Brown-Eyed Bandit? Eh, I can wear contacts.

Full disclosure, there’s, like, a 92% chance that I would run off and have kids with a Djinni. I just can’t help myself. I may or may not end up executed for having, like, 12 Djemdi children before they catch up with me.

But the real reason I would swap places with Amani: Buraqi.

I’d have a whole herd of them. Amani = born of the desert sand. Buraqi = born of the desert sand. WHY HAS NO ONE THOUGHT OF THIS SOONER?! Who’s going to stand in your way when they’ve got a herd of Buraqi bearing down on them?

… Are nightmares tamable? Skinwalkers? Would I get eaten trying? Yeah, probably. Still worth it.

✦ June || Vengeful ✦

You know what? I don’t know what June’s goal in life is or what she wants out of life, but she’s clearly wasting her talents, okay?

Look, I may be as graceful as a bull skating on thin ice, but you give me the ability to use anyone I touch as a meat suit, and I bet you I could become a pretty kick-ass assassin, too.

Also, I would potentially solve the population problem in the meantime while I figure it out. Boom, two for the price of one. You’re welcome.

✦ Yumeko || Shadow of the Fox ✦

Being a half-Kitsune sounds like a ton of fun. Also, tricking people? That’s sort of my thing. Yes, please.

One thing I’ve got going for me, though, is I’m nowhere near as naive as Yumeko, and I see where this is going, bub. *glares at other characters*

I mean, I’ve watched enough anime that I feel I’m pretty qualified to handle these situations better than Yumeko. I’d also be training how to use a sword. Maybe even a talking one.

Okay, I’d maybe end up taken over by an evil talking sword. Some risks are just worth taking.

✦ Max || Chronicles of St. Mary’s ✦

Time travel. As a historian. To study the past. What could be more perfect? I mean, minus the historian thing because, gosh, there’s a lot of history and too many facts and I have a short attention span.

She gets to study dinosaurs. As in din-o-saurs. As in those giant lizards that I have been obsessed with since I was two and found out that people actually geeked out over them and people paid them for it.

Or something like that. I’m pretty sure that’s what paleontologists do, right?

Honestly, I’m just not sure how anyone could resist the ability to travel back in time and study the past first-hand. It’s just too good to pass up.

Also—endless ways I could die! Yay! It’s like wheel of fortune. Spin the wheel and find out what’s going to kill me. An ancient disease? Tripped in the middle of a war and impaled myself? Stepped on by a brontosaur? Accused of witchcraft? The possibilities are limitless!

Hm. I should probably be a little less excited about that, come to think of it …

✦ Mort || Mort ✦

I’d like to say that this isn’t a self-serving choice, but … I’m going to be honest with you lovely people. This is 100% a selfish choice.

I just really want to hang out with Death, okay? He needs a hug and a good friend and maybe someone who is a professional at existential crises to help him through his.

As a writer, I feel eminently qualified for that last one. I’ve also been told I’m a good hugger. See? It’s meant to be.

Also, I’d be a superb apprentice to Death, if I do say so myself. Which I do. Because I understand its importance, and I love the idea of tailoring each death to the person.

Look, if the price of living is dying, that seems like fair value to me (see? I’m a shoo-in for the Goblin Market).

I’m not saying that I’d enjoy killing people. I’m just saying I’d be really, really good at it. That’s all.

✦ Any Minor Scythe || Arc of a Scythe ✦

Speaking of being really good at killing people …

Wait, is that what we were talking about? Anyway, my willingness to be a Scythe would obviously preclude me from the job. But it shouldn’t. It’s not my fault that I take pride in my work, whatever it may be.

Why I should be a Scythe:

✦ I would be far more extra than Goddard
✦ But also 1,000x more logical and … competent
✦ Empathy!
✦ People would soil themselves if I jumped out at them and shouted “boo!”
✦ Get to wear a robe! Robes improve everyday life by 134%
✦ The Scythedom would become 492% more effective because I have logic and am not afraid to use it.
✦ I’m really good at making up random statistics to support my case

Then again, on the other hand, if I were a Scythe, I wouldn’t be able to speak to the Thunderhead, and that seems like a pretty big sacrifice.

I mean, the Thunderhead is just delightful. Meh, I’m sure I could find a way around that rule. There’s always a loophole somewhere.

If you could swap places with any fictional character, who would it be and why?