The House in the Cerulean Sea

A magical island. A dangerous task. A burning secret.
Linus Baker leads a quiet, solitary life. At forty, he lives in a tiny house with a devious cat and his old records. As a Case Worker at the Department in Charge Of Magical Youth, he spends his days overseeing the well-being of children in government-sanctioned orphanages.
When Linus is unexpectedly summoned by Extremely Upper Management he's given a curious and highly classified assignment: travel to Marsyas Island Orphanage, where six dangerous children reside: a gnome, a sprite, a wyvern, an unidentifiable green blob, a were-Pomeranian, and the Antichrist. Linus must set aside his fears and determine whether or not they’re likely to bring about the end of days.
But the children aren’t the only secret the island keeps. Their caretaker is the charming and enigmatic Arthur Parnassus, who will do anything to keep his wards safe. As Arthur and Linus grow closer, long-held secrets are exposed, and Linus must make a choice: destroy a home or watch the world burn.
An enchanting story, masterfully told, The House in the Cerulean Sea is about the profound experience of discovering an unlikely family in an unexpected place—and realizing that family is yours.

Many thanks to Edelweiss and Tor Books for an eARC in exchange for an honest, unbiased review. Quotes are taken from an unfinished version and may differ from the final product.

I’m sitting here trying to write this review, but words are hard and emotions are harder and I have neither anymore. I’m just a puddle on the floor after reading this.

If you could dump some bacon and coffee into me every so often, it’d be much appreciated. Even puddles of goo require sustenance now and then. Also, if you could toss a book or two? If it’s not too much to ask? Yes, I know I’m broken and have no hands to hold them or shuffle pages, but I’ll just … ruminate on them for a while.

The House in the Cerulean Sea is a masterpiece of a book with a slow-burn M/M romance, an older protagonist who’s easy to root for, and characters certain to steal your heart. It made my little Slytherin soul just melt.

I’m not going to lie, but I 100% clicked on this title because Cerulean has been my favorite color since elementary school, and by the jaded old age of eight, I was already tired of explaining to people what cerulean was. I feel vindicated!

For those of you that have read the title of this post and are confused there is no stabby underhandedness in this book. But yet … I loved it? I know, I didn’t expect it, either. But here we are. Everything about this book screams Hufflepuff, but here I am, Durmstrang to the core (because … dark magic, duh), and yet I would like to order more books like this please. Just … just shut up and take my money. All of it.

❧ I’ve seen this comped as “1984 meets The Umbrella Academy with a pinch of Douglas Adams thrown in,” but I’d say, to me, it’s more like A Man Called Ove meets The Little Prince (2015). And still with a touch of Douglas Adams, for good measure.

I’m actually not sure where the Umbrella Academy comp comes in, but if you see this around and go in expecting that … you’ll likely be sorely disappointed. There’s no dark grittiness here, no mystery, no messed up superheroes attempting to solve the world … or at least not destroy it. The only way it’s similar is maybe in the misfits with powers that are hidden from society and put in orphanages, but that’s a pretty tenuous connection in my opinion.

At its heart, the story is about a 40-year-old protagonist who’s a lot like Ove. He’s a stickler for rules and has his routine down, never straying from it. He’s content in the modest life he has, and why wouldn’t he be? What more could he possibly want? Yet, both of them have more thrust upon them whether they like it or not.

On top of that, this story has all the heart (and a little of the whimsical sort of world) from the 2015 film The Little Prince. I specifically say that over the book, because the movie delves into a world that’s a little Big Brother, where everything has its place and someone is always watching and you don’t step out of your lane. Plus, the story and characters are so endearing and charming and whimsical, and this book just felt like everything I loved about that movie.

This book and film are on my all-time favorites list, so I don’t make these comparisons lightly, either.

❧ I keep saying we need more books with older protagonists, and this not only has that, but it has a romance between older characters.

So. Much. Freaking. Yes. Guys, your sex drive and romantic inclinations don’t die when you’re no longer in your 20s, I promise. It’s gonna be okay. This is something I don’t see nearly as often as I’d like, and I was just eating this up. I love reading about older protagonists. Partly because I’m getting up there myself finally (regardless of what my actions might suggest) and partly because older people are the best people. They’re disillusioned enough about life and indifferent enough about the consequences to tell you how they really feel.

Our older protagonist here, Linus, is the Hufflepuffist of all the Hufflepuffs, and it was so easy to fall in love with him and root for him.

His life hasn’t been easy. Mostly, it’s just been humdrum. He lives by rule and order. Dress nice in the morning. Go to work. Follow all the rules. Re-read the handbook to make sure you did the last step correctly. Go home. Rinse and repeat. What a way to live, right? But it’s all he’s known, and he’s never really wanted more.

There’s several things I loved about Linus. First, his narrative has a quiet sort of cynicism that you can’t help but laugh at, almost reminiscent of Eeyore (who, by the way, was always my favorite character and highly relatable). But with slightly less melancholy. Things just don’t tend to go his way, and that’s expressed in small sarcasms and quips, which I loved.

Other than that, though? Linus has heart, darn it. He believes in what he’s doing and is trying to do right for the world in the only way he knows how: by doing a good, thorough job. He believes his work is important and meaningful, and he’s never had any reason to think otherwise.

I can’t say too much about Linus’ arc, because it would tread too close to spoilers, so suffice it to say that this Hufflepuff learns to roar like a Gryffindor just a little bit.

The transformation in him is just … *chef’s kiss*. I couldn’t have asked for a better arc. It’s slow and it’s earned and it’s just so good to see how he changes bit by bit.

❧ Speaking of the romance … oh my. I didn’t think I’d love it as much as I did, but it’s a slow burn, feels-filled M/M romance that I found myself not only rooting for, but gosh did it melt my heart.

This is coming from someone who likes her romance rough. If there’s not at least the chance that one party will kill the other, I tend not to touch it. Because what’s romance without danger? Even worse, this is essentially a romance between two Hufflepuffs. It doesn’t get any fluffier than that. And yet … this thing totally stole my heart while I wasn’t looking? I don’t know what happened.

When I say this romance is a slow burn, I mean it’s a slow. burn. In all senses of both words. Which really gave me plenty of time to decide how I felt about these characters.

Which was, specifically, me uttering frustrated noises and forcing their heads together, because they were either going to kiss or I was going to clonk their heads against each other until they came to their senses, dang it!

I absolutely love slow romances that I can see develop naturally and also become invested in, and I was invested, I’ll have you know. Because Linus … doesn’t really have much going for him. But he’s such a cinnamon roll that he deserves something to go his way for a change.

❧ There’s a lot of social commentary packed into this book, in a way that was not particularly preachy and was a pleasure to read.

The biggest theme, obviously, is discrimination. I mean, monsters are people, too. Unfortunately, civilization seems to have forgotten that, along with some other really important lessons.

This is really where my earlier comp with The Little Prince comes into play, because the lessons come in the same sort of fun, whimsical way, in between the crazy and the action.

They sneak up on you and stab your heart when you’re not looking … but with fuzzy, warm rays of sunshine? What are these feelings?! Am I melting? Am I having a heart attack? I’m not used to this out of the books I read!

The lessons are cleverly disguised so that you learn them without being beaten over the head with them. So that you can rage at the injustices with the rest of the characters, or melt into a puddle of feelings, or sob into your tacos. Or … whatever food you prefer. You do you.

❧ This book was just a perfect blend of all the tropes I love, with a fun twist on them so they take on a life of their own.

The thing about tropes is that we like them for a reason. They’re warm and comfortable, and when done right, it feels like coming home. That’s exactly what this book was for me: a place where I could go, ah, yes, I belong here. I think I’ll stay a while.

Some tropes I particularly loved:
✿ Slow burn romance
✿ Found family
✿ Subverted expectations
✿ Dark humor
✿ Cynical humor
✿ Older protagonists
✿ Belonging
✿ Orphans and orphanages

There are more, I’m sure, but my brain is the consistency of applesauce right now, and you’re lucky it’s even able to spew forth words at this point.

❧ I don’t want to say too much about the characters, but let’s say that each and every one of them won my heart, and I didn’t want to leave them behind on the final page.

Think they’d adopt me? I can totally be part of the family, right? Pretty please?! I would clearly fit in perfectly here, between the Antichrist and the wyvern (because helloooo dragons). I fell in love with these characters from the moment they graced the page. Honestly, what’s not to love about them?

Since I can’t say much about them, because you really just have to discover them for yourself, I’ll leave you with this: expect the unexpected. These characters are not what you think.

Sure, the blurb tells you what they are (which, I’m going to be honest, I didn’t even read the blurb carefully beforehand, so I was doubly surprised). But the real joy is in finding out who they are. And what an eclectic group, indeed. I laughed so hard I cried. Which was probably just to mask the actual crying I was also doing.

These characters had me cracking up so much that my husband actually banished me from the living room, because I was disturbing his TV show. Sure, I sometimes giggle at books, or maybe cackle evilly, but outright belly laugh? That’s something rare. I even shared some passages with hubby, who is the eternal crankmaster and official spoilsport, and even he smiled. So there you have it. The humor is Hubby Approved™.

If you could be any sort of supernatural being (or invent one of your own), what would you be?